I haven’t posted anything in a while. I’ve been a jumble of nerves and busy with appointments, phone calls and finances. Funny, I never said work – work is where I feel most at ease and my mind is at rest.

Work
 I went back to work earlier last week to spend time doing what I do best – working with children. I love my job. I love being part of the lives of little ones who have their whole life before them. I have the opportunity to be a part of that – a big part – and it’s an amazing opportunity. I lead and they follow – yet they are fearless at every opportunity and they live in the moment. I have spent the past 6 months so wrapped up in the busy-ness of the day, that I missed the joy, the meaning, the importance. I missed God and the blessings in it. I am so blessed to be back at work and I enjoy it more now than ever.

Health
As far as my health goes – I feel that being part of my regular routine has helped – I feel good, a little tired but more normal and blessed. I know it seemed simple, I even took for granted that it was a routine health issue. But it isn’t the end – it is a beginning and I have to accept it. I have cancer. I said it. I’m not giving up nor am I  going to let it define me. The treatment, however, is kind of drastic and major. Yet I am less fearful….but not fearless.

Did I shut down? Yes. Did I and do I cry? Yes. I am human. Am I scared? Sure. I feel the surge of helplessness and hopelessness from time to time creep up and I know it will continue. I need all the faith I can muster and all the prayer that I can manage to get through this. I know it will be long and dark but I have to be ready to go this distance. I have to be ready to journey this dark road with my Savior.

Thanks Amy and Josh Wilson Music.

Thank you [everyone] for your prayers and thoughts,

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