I sit here weary and tired (since surgery – I get tired) and wondering where did the Lenten season go? Where has this past year gone? It has been so tumultuous since 2011 arrived. There have been many issues since January. And as Easter Sunday approaches I am bittersweet. I have missed Sundays hands raised in worship and singing in the choir. Wondering what does this all mean? What do I mean? Do I matter? Do I make a difference?

No matter how humble, everyone wants to know that they are loved and they do matter. I have been feeling like this for a long time. After a major life change and move four years ago things have remained unsettled, unfinished, unfocused and chaotic. I have been so disenchanted with church but earnestly seeking God with all my heart – even when it is hard as hell. And it has been really hard this past few years trying to find my focus, meaning and purpose. There are those times when I feel disconnected and far away from my Lord. But I know that HE is there, in every small moment, I can see His Wonderous works.

I can see where, I have gotten ahead of myself I have not let the hand of God work over my life in awesome ways. I get in the way, ALWAYS. And before I know it time has passed and I am clueless as to how I got there. Its nuts. I know I need to slow down, I know I can’t be perfect, I know I need to reflect, refresh and relish all the mysteries that are before me. I pray that I can turn my disenchantment into joy and purpose. Learning to live joyously, full of love and life is harder than it seems. Learning to” live like you belong to God” is one very hard part of this journey of faith.

This Easter I pray that I (and you) can find that part of you that feels worthy to be called HIS and find that you do matter to the Father, you do belong to GOD. I also pray that I will see others as HIS and learn to appreciate all that is God’s. To new life, new hope, new journey – may you be transformed by Christ’s Resurrection.

Happy Easter! Much love and Many Blessings,

Shari

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